857. Short Cuts

Short Cuts
1993
Directed by Robert Altman

Roger Ebert said that no good movie is too long and no bad movie is too short.  I shudder to disagree with my lord and master, but this was a good movie that was just too long.

The film follows the stories of 22 different characters in Los Angeles.  I won't list a description of everyone in the movie, unless someone wants to pay me for some delightful reasons.  The most compelling storyline was Howard and Ann Finnigan's, whose young son Casey is hit by a car by a depressed waitress.  Casey's doctor is the long suffering husband of an untalented artist, who is friends with the long suffering (and now amused) wife of a cheating husband.  The dullest storyline is probably Lori Singer's, who plays a depressed cellist who is generally ignored by her obnoxious mother.

So three hours and some change is a bit long for any film.  It is odd, because after 188 minutes, it still manages to end abruptly.  Jerry's actions are a bit baffling at the end of the film.  Obviously, he had his problems, but compared to the other characters, his life was pretty great.  Maybe that was the point.  It is the weakest among us that snap, not the most troubled.

Still, it is ultimately worth the time, just to see the great performances.  I was particularly delighted with Robert Downey Jr.  Nineties Robert Altman was on point.

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Jennifer Jason Leigh spent time in actual phone sex offices to research her role.  All of her calls were verbatim what she heard.

844. The Player

The Player
1992
Directed by Robert Altman

I kind of hate both Robert Altman (for MASH) and Michael Tolkin (for The Rapture).  However, this was absolutely brilliant.  It must be my romcom moment when I realize that the hunky male has a softer side and isn't such a jerk after all.  Although in this case, I suppose it is males.  No complaints here.

Griffin Mill is a Hollywood studio executive who is tasked with the difficult job of green lighting story pitches.  A new story executive comes on board, threatening Mill's job security.  He starts to receive death threats, which he presumes are coming from one of the many writers he has rejected.  He decides to investigate, but his sleuthing only creates more problems.

This film is pretty hilarious to anyone with even a cursory knowledge of American film.  It pokes fun at serious "artists" as much as it mocks manufactured Hollywood garbage.  It still manages to be somewhat light hearted, as hundreds of people from the industry are in on the joke.  I loved the character of Mill.  Yes, he was an asshole, but I still found myself cheering for him.  The ending has got to be one of the best I have seen.  It fit so well thematically with the rest of the movie, while wrapping everything up perfectly.

Highly recommended.  I might just end up kissing Tolkin or Altman (or both) in the rain.

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

Among the celebrities who made cameos were Cher, Susan Sarandon, Julia Roberts, Bruce Willis, Burt Reynolds, Marlee Matlin, Jack Lemon, and Jeff Goldblum.

602. Nashville

Nashville
1975
Directed by Robert Altman

Just the thought of writing this post makes me tired since there are so many different plot lines in this movie.  I'll take the lazy way out and only give the briefest statements.  It is Monday, after all.

Basically, the film follows the lives of several aspiring and actual country music stars in a five day period.  My favorite storyline involved the love triangle between Bill, Mary, and Tom.  Still, I prefer the television series "Nashville" that is currently in its fourth season.  With the movie, we miss out on Clare Bowen's beautiful singing voice and, of course, Connie Britton's hair.

I didn't particularly enjoy this film.  It's strange that there are 24 main characters, yet not one that I actually like.  It's also nearly three hours and there were definitely parts that seemed to drag, particularly in day one.  Still, I have to admit that this film is an impressive feat.  Unfortunately, just not a very entertaining one.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Every actor was required to write and perform their own songs.  The film was also heavily improvised.

Songs were recorded live.

565. The Long Goodbye

The Long Goodbye
1973
Directed by Robert Altman

Phillip Marlowe keeps showing up on The List, first with Dick Powell and then with Humphrey Bogart.  He also appears frequently on the 1001 Book List.  Personally, I prefer private detectives with a bit more personality, like Nick Charles.  At least he is a friendlier alcoholic.

Phillip Marlowe is asked by his friend Terry to drive him to Mexico.  It turns out that Terry's wife has been murdered.  Whoopsies.  Terry commits suicide in Mexico and as far as the police are concerned, the case is closed.  Marlowe believes there is more to the story.

I was a little bit uncomfortable with this movie.  It was a noir, but it was in color.  The novel is set in the 1940s, but the movie takes place in 1970s Hollywood.  But everyone stills acts like they would in a 40s movie.  Perhaps I am just being an old geeze.  Actually, I know I am being an old geeze.  Still, it hampered my enjoyment of the film.

Elliot Gould is a great actor, but I still prefer Powell or Bogart to Jack Gellar.

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

The fingerprint scene was improvised.

One of the earliest roles of Arnold Schwarzenegger's.

528. McCabe and Mrs. Miller

McCabe and Mrs. Miller
1971
Directed by Robert Altman

I had such high hopes for this film and once again, Robert Altman let me down.  In turn, I feel like I let Roger Ebert down by not liking it since he called the film "perfect." Let's just down this dose of Altman Misogyny as quickly as possible, shall we?

McCabe opens a brothel, which becomes significantly more profitable once he accepts the help of Mrs. Miller.  The Harrison Shaughnessy mining company offers to buy his business but he refuses.  Apparently, none of the men in this movie can tolerate being told no, so the company sends two men to kill him.  McCabe practically wets himself, which isn't exactly what I have come to expect from a Western hero.

That is, of course, the reason everyone goes crazy over this movie: it spins the Western formula on its head.  Part of this is achieved on randomly playing Leonard Cohen music in the background.  I am being extremely hard on this film.  There were good moments; there have to be if Warren Beatty is involved.  Also, it didn't bore me to tears, which in my opinion is worthy of a standing ovation after some of the films we have had to sit through.

So a film I desperately wanted to like but ended up hating.  Maybe you will have better luck.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Leonard Cohen hated the film when he first watched it, but ultimately came around.

Stanley Kubrick raved about the opening scene.

517. M*A*S*H

M*A*S*H
1970
Directed by Robert Altman

We go from Patton to this nasty piece of work and what a horrible transition it is.  I can't understand why anyone would find this film funny.  I found it to be completely upsetting and the fact that it got a television spin off is baffling to me.  Maybe we can make a sitcom based on Birth of a Nation next.

There isn't much of a plot here; it is more like a series of unpleasant vignettes that take place in a mobile hospital unit during the Korean War. The kind of systematic bullying, which borders on sexual assault, that Major Margaret Houlihan has to endure is upsetting in itself.  Although this pissed me off, it was not enough to make me hate the film.  After all, if you couldn't take watching people be mistreated in films, you would be stuck watching Fantasia on a loop.  What upset me the most is the intended audience reaction for this character.  We were supposed to cheer for the soldiers as they sexually humiliated this woman, supposedly because she represented the bureaucracy?  I don't really care why they said they did it; it clearly revealed this malevolence towards women that can't be explained away.  I don't want to reveal what happens to this character, but just know that the outcome drives me completely insane.

Some people may be able to look past this (or simply not care at all; which is unsettling in itself).  But I cannot and for that reason, it is one of the worst movies I have ever seen.

RATING: -----

Interesting Facts:

Donald Sutherland and Elliot Gould went to the studio in hopes of getting Robert Altman removed from the project.  You are all just terrible.

Much of the dialogue was improvised.

#54 in AFI's Top 100.  Ugh.