1060. Revenant

The Revenant
2015
Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu


Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! In honor of this holiday, I chose to review a movie that celebrates Native American culture...well, give me a break. There aren't a lot to choose from.

This movie tells the "true" story of Hugh Glass, a frontiersman who is mauled by a bear and abandoned by his companions. Leo is going to get his Oscar, dammit, even it means getting horizontal with the local wildlife.

I was a little worried about Leo during this performance, as I find him most appealing when he is speaking (which is why he will always be the perfect Romeo to me), but surprise, surprise, I didn't actually mind staring at mute Leo for hours. I did feel like everyone was taking the film a bit too seriously. After all, it was a survival/revenge story, not a biopic about a civil rights leader. Let's calm down a little bit, Inarritu. This did not need to be nearly three hours long. In fact, if it wasn't for Leo's and Hardy's star power, this movie would be rather forgettable.

If you are looking for a good wildlife/man vs. bear story (and who isn't?), I would definitely recommend The Edge over this. No one ever mentions that movie, but it is much more...subtle than this.

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

DiCaprio actually ate a real raw slab of bison liver, as the one they gave him to use looked too fake.

Is it truly a Leo DiCaprio movie if he isn't haunted by images of his dead wife?

The real Hugh Glass didn't have a son or a wife. I guess we only like revenge stories when the guy is avenging his family, not himself. That would just be petty.

1038. Babel

Babel
2006
Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

So this is one of those films that made the critics go crazy, garnered all kinds of awards and nominations, but then is all but forgotten about within the next year.  At least, I haven't heard anyone speak of it, but that might just be me (I try to avoid talking to people in general).

In a desert in Morocco, Abdullah, a goat herder, receives a gun and ammo from his neighbor.  He teaches his two young sons, Yussef and Ahmed, how to shoot jackals with it.  The two boys are doubtful that the gun has a wide range and take shots at a tour bus passing by.  They hit one of the passengers, Susan, in her shoulder and her husband Richard spends the film desperately trying to get help for her.  Amelia, Susan and Roger's nanny, learns of Susan's injury and is ordered to take care of their kids longer than she had planned.  She decides to take the kids to Mexico with her for her son's wedding, which is an extremely ill-advised decision but hey, her boss was being a dick.   Oh yes, and we also follow the story of Chieko, a deaf mute Japanese girl who is struggling to express her sexuality and come to terms with her mother's suicide.  Those are two problems, by the way.

I am not the biggest fan of ensemble films.  Speaking of which, I couldn't for the life of me remember what the movie Happiness was called and had to resort to typing "child molester movie Jon Lovitz" into Google.  I hope that didn't raise any alarms.

Back to my point.  Usually with ensemble movies there are one or two storylines that are just not as interesting as the other plots, but unfortunately they serve as necessary bridges to the other stories.  For this film, I was particularly bored with Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett's story, which essentially didn't change throughout the whole movie.  You can tell they just wanted to work with the director, but sadly, they didn't have too much to work with.  On the other hand, I loved Chieko's story, even though I am certain I didn't understand the ending.

In general, it was cool to experience a movie this ambitious.  But I still think Inarritu is a tool.

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Brad Pitt gave up a lead role in The Departed to be in this film.  Oh honey.

The color red is emphasized in every story.   What an original concept!

1025. Birdman: Or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)

Birdman: Or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)
2014
Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

We now come to perhaps the most pretentious film on the entire List.  It's a big claim and in the comments section you will probably prove me wrong.  But come on.  Deal with that title for a moment.

Riggan Thomson is an actor famous for portraying Birdman, an iconic superhero.  He decides to reinvent himself by writing, directing, and starring in a Broadway play based on a Raymond Carver short story.  Riggan's daughter, Sam, a recovering drug addict, works as his assistant.  He frequently clashes with Mike Shiner, his method actor costar.  Oh yeah, and he is kind of going insane.

Basically, this film just rubbed me the wrong way.  I get that it was supposed to be a homage to Godard, but did Godard ever seem this affected and self-indulgent?  If he did, I don't remember.  Even the in-joke that St. James' theatre being crummy, when it is actually a really nice venue (get it?  How droll) prove that this film was not meant to be accessible to the average movie-goer.

I did enjoy a few scenes; I thought Edward Norton and Emma Stone had great chemistry.  But overall, I thought this movie was too snobby, even for me.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Contains only sixteen visible cuts.

The ending apparently came to the director in a dream.  I'm going to throw my neck out if they keep making me roll my eyes this hard.

952. Amores perros

Amores perros
Love's a Bitch
2000
Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

I have been complaining that there are no good foreign films recently and this is seemingly the answer to my prayers.  Ye gods, we are saved from documentaries on trash collection and dull family melodramas.

Three separate but loosely connected stories are told.  Octavio is in love with his sister in law Susana.  He takes to dog fighting in order to earn money to run away with Susana.  The dog fighting scenes are even more disturbing than the cock fight scenes in No Fear, No Death.  Thankfully, this wasn't a Bunuel film and no dogs were actually hurt...I hope.  Another story follows Daniel, who has recently left his wife for Valeria, a supermodel.  Valeria breaks her leg, leaving her miserable at home while she recuperates (that's a familiar tune, huh?).   One day, her dog gets trapped under a floorboard, causing tensions to erupt between Daniel and Valeria.  The final story follows El Chivo, a hit man who is trying to get in contact with his estranged daughter.

I didn't anticipate liking this one, as I didn't think dogfighting would be a fun topic to explore for over two hours.  Fortunately, it was well paced and seemed more intent on showing us the madness behind the characters who commit such a heinous crime than the crime itself.

So a good film, which is good, because Meet the Parents is next.  Be afraid.

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Shot in dangerous parts of Mexico City and many of the crew members were robbed.